Orb Bronze
New Poem that needs some criticism/comments?
Wrote this last night
Winged Watcher
Looking down as we ascend
I grasp the arms of my dear friend
Rising up above a cloud
Hidden in it’s cool, damp shroud
I wonder how he got so wise
My thought is broken by his eyes
Their deep blue orbs gaze at me
Their color exactly of the sea
His face forms a trademark grin
Proving that he knows no sin
His wings, of course, are feathery white
Like new snow, or soft starlight
Soft, bronze curls caress my face
As he holds this fierce embrace
I must admit he knows me best
As he holds me to his chest
I know no fear in the sky
For he protects me as we fly
His glowing form delays the night
My Guardian Angel holds me tight
The poem is beautiful. There are, though, some verses where the syllables are too much or simply miss. I think you should do something about that… but it’s just a thought. Altogether the poem is nicely written and very creative. ”My thought is broken by his eyes” is my favourite one! Many thanks for the share! 
P.S. I may be mistaking, but I reckon the word ‘exactly’ is unpoetical… What do you think?
iNkA vs. Slurgi 1/2 – StarCraft 2 Beta Commentary with orb and Rhavanna
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